WTF is Up with all the Acronyms?

1:42 PM

Am I the only person who wants to hurl their phone across the room every time I am scrolling through a mommy forum or blog or chat group and a post is inundated with a bunch of acronyms? Like, Oh really? Did your DS shit on the pile of laundry that your LH left out again while your DD spilled your coffee on the M EFFING white rug? What is the point of these stupid abbreviations? Do you desperately need the world to know that you think you're son is darling and your husband is loving and your daughter is dear and your rug is mother effing white? Or is it just too difficult to spell out the actual words?

If you haven't come across these ridiculous acronyms yet consider yourself lucky. If you want to laugh your ass off check out this list of what all the nonsense stands for. My personal favorite from the list? "NMSAA (Not My Style At All). Ohhhhhhhhh Snap!! No she didnt! Wait sorry, that's a lie. My actual favorite is "BM (Breast Milk or Bowel Movement).... really dont wanna mix those two up.

So, in an effort to make light of my annoyance with this idiotic slang I have come up with my own list of useful acronyms that I would use much more regularly than EWCM (Egg White Cervical Mucus)..??!! Oh who am I kidding, I use that one all the time...

GTFTS (Go The Fuck to Sleep)

LMA (Leave Mommy Alone)

LHHADW (Loving Husband Has a Death Wish)

BFC (But First Coffee)

DSHAB (Darling Son Had Another Blowout)

DDTAFIT (Darling Daughter Threw a Fit In Target)

NIB (Namaste in Bed)

PTPBAJETSITB (Pretending To Pee But Actually Just Enjoying The Silence In The Bathroom)

MNAC (Mommy Needs a Cocktail)

KALTAYBAOCF (Keep Acting Like That and You'll Be an Only Child Forever)

OMGYAA (OMG You're Already Awake?)

Hmmmm...yep, that should do it...

Any acronyms I missed? Let us know in the comments section below. Want to follow along our crazy lives as very tired #mombies? Follow us on Instagram!

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  1. Oh man, these bloody acronyms are a serious pet peeve of mine. It does my head in. What's the point? JUST SAY THE BLOODY WORD! my kid, my son, my baby, the little shit... I don't care what you call them, but let's all be honest, you don't call them 'dear'. I can't believe the majority of people are cool with using these stupid abbreviations either. So why? Anywho, thanks for the laugh, and allowing me vent a teeny bit too. For now though, DSJSOMA (dear son just shit on me again) so I gotta go.


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